19 Aug 2016

The Wedding Invitation

The Wedding Invitation

The following are questions received from OurMarriage.com visitors.

My parents will be paying for the wedding and my fiances parents are divorced and remarried, how do we word the wedding invitation to include all three sets of parents?  Thank you!

Dear Amy

As a general rule of etiquette, the parents paying for the wedding are the ones issuing the invitation.  In your case, because you have stated, it is your parents paying for the wedding, it is entirely correct not to include your fiancé’s parents names.  However, if you chose to add his parents names to the invitation, there are a couple different ways to do so.

The parents of
Amy Jones and Groom’s Name
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their children
on the date of your wedding
Nineteen Hundred and Ninety Eight
at the time of your wedding
Church name
Church address
City and state address

Mr. and Mrs. Amy’s Parents Name
Mr. and Mrs. Groom’s Mother and Stepfather’s Name
Mr. and Mrs. Groom’s Father and Stepmother’s Name

Another example would be….

Mr. and Mrs. Amy Jones Parents Name
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
Amy Your Middle Name
Mr. Groom’s  Full Name
Son of Mrs. New Husband’s Name (or) Son of Mr. and Mrs. New Husband’s Name
and Mr. Groom’s Father’s Name  (or)  and Mr. and Mrs. Groom’s Father’s Name

I hope this helps in your decision.  Also, just in case you missed “Unique Wedding Idea’s” on our web site, be sure to check it out again.  Web sites are available to announce your upcoming nuptials, giving opportunity for you to share a wealth of information about you and your fiancé’s wedding plans, how you met, directions to your wedding, where you are registered, your wedding party, and the list goes on and on.  Best of all, it is a secure site and only those people with whom you share your web site address will have access to it.


When addressing a wedding invitation to a widow, is her own first name used or that of her late husband?   Also, on the inside envelope, first names are eliminated, is that correct?  What about children under 18 – are their names written on the outside envelope?  What about the inside envelope?   Thank you so very much.  I will look forward to your answer.


Dear NAR:

When addressing an invitation to a widow,  send it using her husband’s name, such as Mrs. George Cunningham.    The inside envelope would be addressed to your guest, such as Aunt Wilma.  If your elderly guest does not have a title, such as “aunt,” you can address the inner envelope to Mrs. Cunningham.

Children’s names are not written on the outside of the envelope, but they are written on the inside envelope if you want them to attend.    If you want to include them on the outside, address the envelope to Mr. and Mrs. Husband’s Name and Family.

we wanted to seal each of the outside envelopes for each wedding invitation using a wax seal of the symbol for double happiness. Obviously this would require a great deal of effort above and beyond hand calligraphing each invitation.  however, aside from the added labor, is that proper etiquette?  or do rules of etiquette forbid such a  thing?


Dear David:

Sealed outer envelopes are a wonderful idea.  Very few people ever have the privileged of receiving such a quaint envelope.  It is absolutely proper.


Ourmarriage Consultant

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